The More I Learn, The More I Am AMAZED!

The more I learn, the more my thought processes are informed by the information (that sounds circular; bear with me), the more I let the free association of ideas, dreams, facts, and 'What-Ifs', the more I let that stew churn...

The more I am AMAZED.

I could never understand people who thought science was BORING! Wonder and amazement lurk around every corner.

A sort of aside: I once read a story (One of Zenna Henderson's 'The People' stories, can't remember which one, they are worth reading if you can find them) where a boy would ask a dad a 'what?' or 'why?' or 'how come?' question, and Dad wouldn't answer him immediately, but days later without preamble would just give the answer. Maybe he didn't know at the time, or maybe it just needed thinking about, but he would just drop the answer in the boy's lap, so to speak, and leave him to his own devices. The boy was used to it; it was just the way his dad did things.

I know, TL/RD: the boy would ask a question, the answer would come later, sometimes days later.

My brain works that way. 

When we were learning about cilia and flagella in junior high life science class, someone asked "how do they spin?" The answer was somewhat vague. I absorbed that as 'I'll get the answer later'; I, too, had by that time questions I couldn't get immediate answers to, so I tabled that question. Every now and then I'd get serendipitous answers, 'A-HA!' moments that would make me smile and say to myself, so that explains THAT!

Today one of those 'A-Ha's happened, trying up one thing, and borrowing explanations from things I already knew. Midway through the episode I found myself grinning.

Another aside: I have learned though experience that if I have a half-smile, whatever I am experiencing is pleasing either the left brain (logical, etc.) or the right brain (artistic, etc.), depending on if the smile was on the right or the left. A broad grin, therefore, involves the entire brain. (Try this yourself, your mileage may vary...)

So here I am, grinning to beat the band, and I ask myself, "Why am I grinning?" and I realized that this episode made my entire brain happy. People are different, so maybe for you this won't be the case, but here is the link:

     "Nature's Incredible Rotating Motor" 

From the SmarterEveryDay (no link) YouTube channel. I ended up subscribing. No requirement that you do so, though.

My life is full of these tabled questions. I'm sure yours is as well. Every now and then we get the wild hare and have to chase these answers down. Sometimes we are content to leave them on the list of "Life's Great Unanswered Questions," and get on with our day.

Sometimes we get a surprise answer to one of those tabled questions that makes us grin. Sometimes, the answer that we decide to chase down brings grins to other faces when we find it. 

That is a good thing.

Each of us have the ability to put a smile on people's faces (resisting the urge to quote Oscar Wilde). However you do it, you can put a smile on someone else's face. if you can include Wonder and Amazement for yourself and someone else, so much the better.

Yes, You Can!

Expect Problems

In our class today we were detailing all of our fears of being able to do the job once we went out to the production floor. It wasn’t phrased like that, mostly. It was phrased in the ‘what if?’ mode. The biggest ‘what if’ being “What if I don’t know the answer?” Being new and just out of training, not having the answer at our fingertips will be a given. What our practice time will amount to is learning how to find the answers. Most of us have worked on the phones, so taking calls, per se, won’t be the main problem.

The problem is, we will have problems. Life is a series of bumps in our path. Sometimes they are very large obstacles, not just a ‘bump’. My main problem is not the lack of knowledge, the unfamiliarity with the systems or even not particularly liking to deal with people on the phone (hey, you do what you have to do). My biggest problem is when my brain seems to fog up. I personally get nervous and angry when I can’t seem to think straight. This gets me agitated, and when I’m agitated I can’t think straight (see earlier). This is not a positive feedback loop.

Having had this happen (more than) a few times, I have learned to anticipate and plan for the times I become agitated. I have my worry stone and by squeezy ball. I write encouraging sticky notes and post them on my monitor. I take my walk around the building at lunchtime to give my body some physical activity to release the pent up adrenaline. I focus on pine trees and mountain streams in the off moments. And I try to remember to breathe. Breathing is good. It gets rid of carbon dioxide and brings in the vital oxygen. The very act of breathing relaxes the body. And, in my case, helps get rid of the brain fog.

The ‘Question and Answer’ time was good. It got our fears out into the open. More to the point, it got the problems out into the open. When we knew about the problems we could help each other on finding solutions (and not just answering questions). The solution in this case was to ‘Rely on your resources’ to point us in the right direction. Particularly for me, it’s to drill myself on the systems until they are nearly automatic. The scripting comes naturally enough to me that it won’t be a problem (that word again) to pick up. And despite me not particularly liking to talk to people, I do that well enough to get me through.

It all comes down to the ‘how-to’s’. How to do this, how to do that. Once you know how-to, the job is easy. This is called ‘know-how’. Once we know how to do the job, the fear of not being able to goes away, and we’re better able to get the job done.

Our biggest problem, then, is fear. Fear cripples us by making us doubt our abilities. Fear also attacks us by causing us to focus on the consequences of the misstep. How many mountain climbers reached the summit by looking down? Yes, we need to be aware of the consequences of a misstep so we don’t trivialize the consequences. But we focus on the task at hand, looking toward the goal. When we focus on making each step the best step we can, the precipice tends to fade into the background. We never quite forget it’s there, it just doesn’t command our attention.

Again, it all comes down to our focus (see my earlier blog). If we focus on our problems that’s all we’ll see. If we focus on the solutions we will make better headway.

Much has been said about the Law of Attraction. I’m not sure I buy into the ‘create your own universe’ aspect. But I cannot deny the logic of focus: what you focus on, commands your attention, sometimes to the exclusion of everything else. What you focus on draws you to it, just like wanting to see more detail in that photograph or painting that catches your eye. Consequently, you tend to move away from other things.

What does this come down to?

Like the title says: expect problems, but don’t let them dominate your thinking.

Expect problems, expect to overcome them.

Yes, you can!

Anger - Forgiveness

Two sides of a coin.

Anger does little good for most folks.

Certainly there are times to get angry and stay angry until the reason for the anger is resolved, wrongs are righted, injustices satisfied. Most wars are finished (and sometimes started) on the idea of a wrong to be righted. Sometimes it's even true.

But that's not the kind of anger I'm talking about.

I'm talking about the little rages we have when someone cuts us off in traffic, insults our dignity, or otherwise offends us. Such small things can have tragically large consequences. For instance:

= Someone makes a lane change to get to an exit. The person cut off races down the same off-ramp hard on the tail of the first, striking the vehicle, and both cars are totaled when the both go off the embankment. Result: Property damage and injury to both people.

= A man fires a gun on New Years Eve. He misses his intended victim and the .44-cal slug pierces the wall of a home. Result: an innocent young girl dies in her sleep.

= A twelve-year-old shoots a six-year-old in the school yard for 'dissin'" him by stepping on his shadow. I doubt she knew what she had done wrong. Result: one child dead and the other - still a child - incarcerated.

Yet, such things could be avoided if we taught forgiveness on the part of the wronged party instead of conflict resolution by gunfire. Most things are accidental or unintentional, and most people would make a small change to not offend if informed. The grace of giving way covers a lot of pains. So does forgiving, and not remembering the slight, or the hurt, or the debt.

"I’ll get even!"

How? Is it worth the hurt returned?

"Yeah, but he owes me!"

Yes, but will he ever care?

"I'll never forgive him until he begs for it!"

You may have a long time to wait. Ultimately, who is being hurt by your action?

"He is!"

Only if he knows, and cares. The Roman soldiers were only doing a job when they nailed people to crosses. Whether they were forgiven or not was beside the point to them. But forgiving his executioners I'm sure enabled Jesus to die a more peaceful death.

"Cold comfort!"

But comfort nonetheless.

The truth is the only person being hurt by our un-acted upon anger is ourselves. And if we do act on it, often times we hurt more than what we intend. The proverb of "A man who seeks revenge must first dig two graves," is truer than most of us want to admit.

So, forgive.

Of course the truly contrite person will appreciate the forgiveness and mutual healing is apt to occur when the one injured forgives the one doing the injury. Relationships are restored that way. Sometimes that healing starts when we forgive the other without waiting to be asked. The person in the wrong may doubt that forgiveness is even possible.

I've managed to offend someone in particular, who told me, when I tried to apologize, that she neither gave nor accepted apologies. Our acquaintanceship ended at that point, as she continued to be raging mad against me. I tried to apologize a few more times after that, and gave up when I saw that it was pointless. It did explain a lot about her, however. You see, I'd been waiting for her to say "I'm sorry," concerning some slight she had given me, and she was never going to do it. I moved on.

I wonder if she still pulls up her anger and stokes its furnace regarding that personal bad day I had that spilled out on the rest of the people around me. I needed a lot of grace that day. And in that light, I could understand how she felt justified in "Never forgiving me." I knew I was contrite. I also forgave her for not forgiving me. I hope she has found the wisdom of forgiveness since then.

And yet I do the same thing she did: I trip over some memory and I'm flashing white-hot anger again. I try. I try to forgive, grant grace, ignore, whatever. What doesn't work is hashing it out in my mind again. When I fight these ephemeral battles over again I'm usually in no shape to be kind to anyone, including myself.

When I practice forgiveness, including forgiving myself for my own shortcomings, I do much better. In a weird way, though, the other is more "fun." It's hard to explain, except maybe to an adrenaline junkie, but part of me enjoys the rush, even as it threatens to destroy me.

Forgiveness is more for the forgiver than it is for the forgiven. The rush to destruction is sidetracked. Peace has an opportunity to calm, to mend, to heal.

In short, forgiveness brings us closer to that place where God dwells.

Let go of your anger. Forgive the offender. Let peace flow in.

Yes, you CAN!

HOW WELL THEY KNOW ME!

The same email came from two different directions and into my inbox on the same day:


Today Is National Mental Health day!

You can do your bit by remembering to send an email to an unstable friend.

(Well...my job's done!)

Some days, it's not even worth chewing through the restraints

How well they know me!

And, as I like to say, a little insanity can be a healthy thing. IF it can make you smile somewhere along the way.

And a good suggestion from my wife, a very wise woman, is to sing songs of praise, even when you don't feel like singing anything. It's easy to sing praises when we feel on top of everything. But the time we need to sing praises and be in our Father's arms is when everything is on top of us.

And I may have just offended some of you.

Those of you who don't have some sort of relationship with Creator God just now felt slapped in the face. I'm sorry, as it was NOT my intention to offend. But, part of this blog is to tell you what works for me. If you don't have such a relationship it may not work for you. The odd thing is, though, God meets us where we are, He comes more than half-way: He comes all the way. If you start to sing praises (or, if you feel like you can't sing, merely speaking will do), even if you don't feel like it, He will come to you. You may find that it is an experience you want to repeat.

Despite what you may have heard, God is not willing that any be apart from Him, but He is also respectful enough of our feelings that He will not force His presence on us if we do not want him around. And even Christians push Him away. Or put Him in a box they take out on Sunday.

Hence, my depression cycle: I did that very thing.

My wife is wise. She told me that even if I only sang that simple children's song we are teaching our little one, it would be enough to start the process:

Jesus loves me, this I know

For the Bible tells me so

Little ones to Him belong;

We are weak, but He is strong!

Yes, Jesus loves me,

Yes, Jesus loves me,

Yes, Jesus loves me,

The Bible tells me so!

It's not so much a 'Belief' as it is a 'trust'. If you need verses to back up the song, here are two:

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." - John's Gospel 3:16-17 New International Version (NIV)

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus" - Paul's letter to the Romans 8:1 (NIV)

Christianity is not so much a system of rules (though many think it is) as it a relationship with someone who has an interest with you. It is true that if you live by the 'rules' of Christianity you will generally be considered a 'good person'. Remember, though, that's what the Pharisees thought they were doing, and along the way they lost the love for God, and missed experiencing the love of God.

Anyway, I've wandered a bit. The idea is to find that smile that belongs to you. Even more, to find that joy that belongs to you.

God Bless, and,

Yes, You Can!

How Depressing

Apropos of nothing in particular, but this job search thing is getting me down. I hope I won't need to write a "Devil Discouragement III" entry, but life can be like that.

Remembering a verse I wrote some years back:

"Your Job is not your Worth,
You have Value from your birth.
Your loving given
Means more to livin'
Your Job is NOT your Worth!"

I have to focus on the good & look for the opportunities.

More on that later, maybe tomorrow. For now I have to go.

As Always,

Yes, you CAN!

Devil Discouragement part II

Ran across a posting on another site I blog at & had to reply to the poster. This person has been having a rough go, and I gave her what encouragement I could. I thought I would share it with you here, as it seemed to fit right in with my last posting:

Depression happens to everyone, at one time or another. Sometimes it catches and holds us. You, specifically. Me, too.

For a while I was resigned in knowing I had the mood swings from the deep lows to the exuberant highs; I accepted one as the price for the other. Then the lows got lower, and the highs not so high. Then low and lower.

It got so bad I lost my job, in part, because of it. That, with a family to support, did not help the depression I was feeling.

I've been fighting my way back these last five years, and it is a fight. I say that to let you know that it's not easy, and I know it. I've been there at around 45-years-old rather than 25, and it's been a long hard fight, and I'm not entirely done with it, yet. But the light at the end of the tunnel is a lot brighter than before.

To help yourself, you've got to focus on the good things of life (cue ending theme of "The Life of Brian' now). Focusing on the things that depress you only gets you more depressed. You know that. You knew you had to leave the hotel room after dwelling on those thoughts all night, else you would have attacked yourself. Dwell instead on the things that make you smile. There are a lot of them and they are there for a reason. See something as simple as a flower (are there flowers in England this time of year?), or a snowflake and see the simple beauty of its order.

See things as you did as a six-year-old child (hopefully that's not a bad time in your life), and laugh. I'm told that as children we would laugh 300-400 times a day. Seeing our three-year-old at play, I believe it. As adults it's seldom above 25 times. The same source recommends at least 50 good belly laughs a day for good mental health. I'm not there yet, but it seems to be helping. Watch a Fawlty Towers rerun and get a good belly laugh out of Basil stepping on his roast duck, or Manuel not finding the dining room because the builders had closed it up. If Fawlty Towers is not your speed, find something else, Benny Hill or Are You Being Served. The point is to focus not on the trouble but on the solution. And the solution to being down is to find something to lift you UP. Believing in Jesus is supposed to be a grace-filled Up, not a guilt-ridden DOWN. Whatever your Christian friends are telling you, remember that fact.

I feel like I'm preaching at you, and if it comes off that way, I apologize. I just want you to hang on long enough to come out the other side of this as a whole person. Meanwhile, I've got another computer to fix, and there's a squirrel running around in the basement ceiling (Really!) that I've got to do something about.

God Bless and Keep Smiling!

I can't top that today, so I'll sign off with the usual ...

Yes, You CAN